High performant way for waking REALLY fast
Precondition: Extremely sleepy.
Solution: Go to a coffee shop, order their strongest coffee, add lots of sugar. Go to the table and take a sip. Spill the coffee on top of the hideously expensive MacBook Pro.
Result: Instant wakefulness.
The MBP seems fine, and I am using it to type this, but that was a big scare.